homestuckfateeditionfandomcom-20200214-history
060116-Friendship Is A Virus
hermeticMonophobe HM began trolling teasingAsperity TA at 00:48 -- HM: ∴ Meira shuffles down the hallway, hand as a guide against the wall. She stops briefly at each doorway and draws a sort of memory map in the air. It's simply hand motions, but you can tell she's trying to commit it to memory. TA: She's curled in on herself and leaning on the door to her room, sitting on the floor. She sniffles once as she notes Meira (or is that Moira? She can't tell them apart.) making absurd handmotions in the air. Lorcan doesn't immediately say anything, but stares instead. HM: ∴ Meira, catching the brief sniffle, proceeds at a slower pace, feeling gently with her feet and hands so she won't run into anyone. HM: ∴ At least not harshly. HM: ∴ "Hello?" TA: She sniffles again, quickly wiping her face with the heels of her hands. "Hello..." Her voice is a little shaky. HM: ∴ "Oh, I'm... unfamiliar with this voice. Who is this?" She addresses the wall. TA: "Lorcan....." HM: ∴ "Ah. Are you well?" She continues to feel against the wall and eventually slides down to sit just a little bit too far away for friendly conversation. TA: "No." She doesn't recognize her as Meira, partially because she really doesn't remember which one sacrificed her eyes. HM: ∴ "Would you like to talk it out?" TA: "Maybe?" Her voice cracks a little. "I try to be good for him. I try to be what he needs." HM: ∴ "Who is in need?" TA: "Nyarla, my idiot of a moirail." HM: ∴ Meira exhales. HM: ∴ "Ah, well... he has made his own decisions." TA: "He's an idiot!" Her voice gets away from her. HM: ∴ "I wonder how to get concepts through to a person like that." TA: "If I knew, we probably wouldn't have the problem him of being double dead. But I don't know if this is my fault or not. Am I to blame for my moirail not having common sense?" HM: ∴ "No. I had also attempted to talk some sense into him. A little before, a little after. I did not want to disrupt any relationships though, as I don't understand them much. I can only be so friendly." HM: ∴ "Its much like speaking to a virus. It has one purpose, and it corrupts what is around it. You can send it other signals, but it only knows how to destroy, so it confuses the signals and continues on its way..." HM: ∴ "I would think someone who tolerates that often for that persons wellbeing would be the most selfless." TA: "Why does that...." She stops. "I wish I could make this much sense to him... Though the virus analogy would probably get me yelled at...." HM: ∴ "I found that, while analogies are good to use on normal thinking creatures, Nyarla will warp whatever he hears to further his own goals. Even when I suggested accepting his fate, he pushed it back on me. Saying something about as long as *I* think it would work." TA: She covers her mouth with her hand and stifles a laugh. TA: "You've gotten him right? To the best of my knowledge anyways... He's done the same thing with me." HM: ∴ "I am trying to think of a way he can redeem himself, but I think he has honestly burnt all of his bridges. He at least doesn't believe anyone listens to him correctly." She makes airquotes around 'correctly'. HM: ∴ "Which is bothersome. He is the last remaining time player, and he is... well... not spending it well." HM: ∴ "How can I make things go better for you, then, Lorcan? Since you are upset over what a lost cause he has made himself?" TA: "He doesn't think that I should offer suggestions until AFTER he's finished speaking, regardless of if I have questions." She sounds disgusted. "I don't know. I wish I knew what I could do to help him...." TA: "He said he was still pale for me," she waves her hand as she speaks. "But I don't know how far my pale feelings go anymore. I have better luck talking to Serios about my problems than I do Nyarla." HM: ∴ "Serios is the passively militant one, yes?" TA: "Yes." HM: ∴ "I thought he was occupied with the Oracle and his loyalty to Aaisha." TA: "Uh." TA: She pointedly looks at the floor, regardless of the fact that Meira can't see her. HM: ∴ "I have a lot of difficulty keeping the group organized in my mind though. I hear about things second-hand. Sometimes even further removed. And it is complicated by the confusing relationships that both humans and trolls have, and their potential intersections." Meira sighs. TA: "Troll relationships are easy." Lorcan fiddles with her dress. "Hard to be in, but easy to understand. I don't know anything about humans." HM: ∴ "From what I understand, they have friendships, which can seem like deep and intimate things, as well as shallow and fairweather. It seems to be a spectrum. And their romance is of one term, but can encompass aspects like poor treatment and insults to tender moments and euphoria. They seem to really enjoy spectrums." TA: "That sounds complicated." She's enjoying the distraction though. HM: ∴ "It is too complicated for me, I think. I know that in the past I have not functioned well in most types of relationship." TA: "Quadrants are easy... I guess..." Lorcan stops fiddling with her dress and look back at Meira. "Then again, I could just be bad at quadrants too." HM: ∴ "How would you know? If you're measuring with your relationship with Nyarla, it is an outlier and should not be factored in." TA: "It's not just him." She sighs. HM: ∴ "Would you like to talk about it?" TA: "As long as you don't tell Libby......" HM: ∴ "Hmm... Well, I have managed not to tell her that I helped Nyarla escape upon his suggestion, so I think I could manage another secret." HM: ∴ "But I don't want you to feel pressured simply because I am curious." TA: "So that's how he got out....." She doesn't pursue the topic. "Okay so. This is one of those quadrant things. If Nyarla hadn't upset me earlier I would be talking to him about this.... But.. I don't want to tell him about this. Not now." HM: ∴ "As heartless as it sounds, its strange to have a relationship with a dead man." HM: ∴ Meira nods. TA: "It probably is strange, but I'm not worrying about that right now." Lorcan waves her hand somewhat impatiently. HM: ∴ Meira jumps a little bit at the disturbance in the air. TA: "Nyarla... doesn't deserve to hear this anymore. Sorry." She quickly puts her hand back in her lap. "Nyarla and I are moirails, represented by diamonds. Eribus and I are matesprits, represented by hearts." She fiddles with her dress again. HM: ∴ Meira nods HM: ∴ "There is no conflict, then?" TA: "No. That's not what's bothering me." HM: ∴ "Sorry for my assumption." TA: She resists the urge to wave her hands again. "Serios is what's bothering me. Not so much him but more like who he's matesprits with and just everything surrounding *her*." HM: ∴ "Ah... yes. Twink relationships are quite intense." TA: "I don't want to die again...." HM: ∴ "Hmmm...." TA: "He confuses me and I hate him for confusing me!" HM: ∴ "Serios?" TA: "Yes!" Her voice starts to get away from her again. She's almost yelling. HM: ∴ "Is this the sort of hatred that is covered by your culture's relationships?" TA: "Yes. He would be considered my kismesis, which is spades." HM: ∴ "Ah... I... hmm..." Meira puts her hand to her chin in thought. "I know that Twink culture is highly possessive regarding their partners. If his red is filled by her primer and commitment, that is absolutely not a safe thing to pursue. But... one can't help their emotions, right?" TA: "I don't want to die again. He said something about me not deserving that. It was a very heated conversation... He was going to talk to her about it...." Her voice gets quieter again. TA: "I've been warned a few times about this. But we just keep going." HM: ∴ "What is your role in this game?" TA: "Role?" She sounds confused. "You mean my Class and Aspect?" HM: ∴ "Yes." TA: "Bard of Hope, if the guide Serios threw at my face is anything to go by." HM: ∴ "Oh! Hm... you might be able to use your power to push those emotions away from yourself. I have not seen a Bard of Hope in... " Meira continues to think, but pauses, and had she any eyes, she would be staring out into nothingness. "I am not able to calculate that, nor is the exact timespan important. Suffice it to say that it has been longer than traditional memory." TA: "What does a Bard even do?" HM: ∴ "It is... complex... but I believe that it is possible for you to remove and grant your aspect. I know that sounds vague, but my memory is not a steel trap, nor is steel terribly durable in the sort of timespan I am referencing." TA: "So I could remove or grant Hope." She doesn't sound very convinced nor is it a question. HM: ∴ "I would attempt, if it were me, to remove my personal hope of the success of that relationship, as a deterrent." TA: "I don't know how to do that.... Sorry I don't know which Handmaiden you are...." HM: ∴ "Oh. I'm Meira. Think of it like... "E for empty eyes." okay?" She laughs. TA: "Oh... Okay..." She fidgets a little closer. "I'm sorry that you lost your eyes for him...." HM: ∴ "Ha. Well, It's a pointless loss now, isn't it? Something for nothing, isn't that always how trades go?" TA: "I shouldn't apologize for him, I know. But I feel responsible for that as his moirail." HM: ∴ "There is a bright side, I suppose. I can work on other senses.Sight is so heavily depended on. After all, the Oracle lacks eyesight and is on a level that I could never reach. Maybe there is a secret of some sort to be learned here." HM: ∴ Meira quietly gasps, "I wonder if its possible for you to transfer your feelings for Serios onto Nyarla. Do you think it would provide the needed distraction?" TA: She quickly backs away from Meira. TA: "No. Nononononono." HM: ∴ "Ah... sorry. Assumptions are... not good. I have stated I am poor with relationships, but I keep finding new lows. I didn't mean to be harmful." TA: "He tried that with me." She hisses, more in fright than anything else. "I don't want to do that again. I don't promise that won't end badly for one of us." HM: ∴ "Oh! I... I had no way to know. I'm so sorry." TA: "It's okay Meira." She clutches her arms about herself. "It was a short-lived thing that wasn't even all that hate-filled? I don't think it would be worth it." HM: ∴ "I do think you are strong enough to move on from whatever you need to. Be it Nyarla, Serios, or both. After all, you've survived the Oracle's sentence thus far. Which appears not to have been as simple as once thought." TA: "I made a deal with her to be let out. Which made Nyarla start to not trust me." She looks at the floor. HM: ∴ "A Deal? I've missed a lot in my own confinement." TA: "Nyarla had done something to bother Libby so she contacted me. I guess because he and I were still on good terms as moirails... She told me to flay him or give him to her to do something with, I don't remember what. I reccommended imprisonment instead." HM: ∴ "She thinks highly of you..." HM: ∴ Meira mutters something that sounds like 'interesting' TA: "Who does." HM: ∴ "She took your recommendation, didn't she?" TA: "I don't know if that was out of any actual feeling towards me." HM: ∴ "I guess you can't know either way with that mentality." TA: "I don't exactly think she'll be too happy with me once Serios talks to her again." HM: ∴ "I may be able to give a bit of padding to that." HM: ∴ "I would have to get there quicker than him though..." HM: ∴ "So... lets see how quickly I can make it to the office." HM: ∴ Meira stands up, a little wobbly. TA: "Do you want help?" TA: Lorcan stands up and dusts herself off. HM: ∴ "I'll ask if I do, but for the moment, I need to overcome the lack of balance from the dependency on vision." TA: "Okay. Trying to be friendly. I don't remember which one of you didn't like me when I first got here.... TA: " HM: ∴ "Hm? I remember you being stubborn and not understanding rules of ownership, but it can be attributed to cultural difference. We did try to warn you." TA: "If it makes you feel better, I'm still stubborn." HM: ∴ "It's not a bad trait all the time. One must choose their poisons carefully though." TA: "I'll have to take your word for that... I know a few trolls who'd like me to be less stubborn." HM: ∴ "Do your goals align? Its an important thing to consider when implementing the wishes of others." HM: ∴ Meira places her hand on the wall again. TA: "That depends on who you're talking to. With Nyarla... I thought so. With Serios, both yes and no. When he was on Eribus' team, not so much. Now, it doesn't seem like we're fighting over goals so much as personality traits." HM: ∴ "A distraction from the game. Keep it in mind." Meira smiles and then takes a few steps forward. "I am going to try to talk to the Oracle before Serios. Good Luck, and feel free to contact me if you need it. My chat handle is hermeticMonophobe and I have text to speech and... speech to text, so it all works out." TA: "Thank you, Meira. This helped a lot... If that was possible." She smiles back, even though she knows Meira can't see. "I hope things go well." -- teasingAsperity TA gave up trolling hermeticMonophobe HM at 02:51 -- Category:Lorcan Category:Meira